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Illustration by Erin Aniker. My First Time is a column and podcast series exploring sexuality, gender, and kink with the wide-eyed curiosity of a virgin. We all know your "first time" is about a lot more than just popping your cherry. From experimenting with kink to just trying something new and wild, everyone experiences thousands of first times in the bedroom—that's how sex stays fun, right?
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A Therapist Reveals the Surprising Truth about Older Men Marrying Younger Women

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T here is a maximum number of times a woman can get annoyed about what a French intellectual thinks about her arse. It was a hard-left version of Jordan Peterson that was, if you can possibly imagine such a thing, even more annoying. Some men will trade in a lot of shared cultural reference points for a bit of admiration. Likewise, the cliche is that young women date older men because they are richer, whereas nearer the truth is that they seem to know a lot of useful stuff. When I was 21, I went out with a year-old Australian. He seemed impossibly mature; he wore aftershave and drank only Wolf Blass.
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I find it genuinely bizarre that having sex with a man 20 years older than you is still taboo. During dinner with a friend recently, she asked me, with one eyebrow raised, what I think the main difference is between sleeping with older men versus younger men. Their grimaces are the giveaway.
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In a Me Too world, is it worth exploring the power dynamics that exist when an older man pursues a much younger woman? Memoirist Joyce Maynard thinks so. Salinger when he was 52 and she was an year-old aspiring writer. Their love story was short-lived. After writing about the affair in a book published in , Maynard was labeled a leech and an opportunist by the literary world.
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